Archive for August 31st, 2009|Daily archive page

Settling in

I am exhausted today, despite the decent night of sleep. I guess it’s catching up with me a little bit, all this fuss over Mom. I did go back to work. And got some work done. But I also went to the Alz center to fill out the required admission paperwork. When I got there, Mom was just entering the lobby. “Isn’t this amazing,” she said when she saw me. The activities director, meeting me for the paperwork, said Mom had attended church this morning. I sat Mom on the couch in the lobby and said I would be meeting with Meg and would come out and visit Mom a little later.

An hour later, I emerged and found Mom on that same couch in the lobby, sound asleep.

Mom and dog/cat take a little morning nap.

Mom and dog/cat take a little morning nap.

I figure if she can relax enough to fall asleep in this public space, she is feeling pretty good. Two different staff members have told me about seeing Mom plop onto the same couch. The business manager who happened to be in on Sunday said at one point Mom had her legs hoisted over an arm of the couch and was lying on her back, fast asleep. This cracks me up. Mom really never met a couch she didn’t like. Today, I woke her up and combed her hair and walked her into lunch before I left.

Saturday and Sunday visits went well. I got all of Mom’s clothes and belongings labeled with her name. I painted her nails on Saturday and we took a walk in the secure outdoor area. She also played a little shuffleboard. On Sunday, she played a little game knocking balloons around with those swimming noodle toys, and later, we watched Jackie Gleason on TV in the program area for a little while. I said I needed to get going to the grocery store and she said, “Go ahead and do what you need to do” and said she would be fine staying there and watching TV. She has said she’s afraid of getting lost, that she is afraid in general. But she isn’t really saying these things with the feeling that she had before when she was making complaints about moving. Perhaps she is saying them out of habit now. But she does not seem fretful. Staff report that her appetite is very good – and she does not eat as well when she is stressed, I have found. A receptionist saw her walking around and sitting in the lobby Saturday with a friend, though I don’t think she remembered doing that by the time I showed up later that day. I imagine she feels uneasy sometimes, that she knows she’s someplace new. But it is not causing the profound anxiety that she had at the other nursing home, where she was agitated so much of the time. As Patrick says, it wasn’t just the administrator at Whetstone telling us that it wasn’t working out with Mom; Mom was telling us, too, in the only way she knew how.

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